The Bot Murders

Turn 95
Just a Misunderstanding

Welcome Back, Loyal Vidshow-watching Citizens! And now back to our show.

Episode 3: Larry-R’s Lament

Turn 095: Just a Misunderstanding

Dean-O looks at the newly arrived Roy-R and says, “Ah, Roy. Good of you to join us. There was a misunderstanding earlier, but it’s all sorted out now.”

Quentin-R unscrews the barrel from his pistol and tosses the pistol body to Hayate-R, <clatterclatterclatter> who drops it, but then bends down, picks it up again, and gives it a quick inspection. Quentin-R remains hidden under the desk, however, and says to Dean-O, “Sir, I’ll report to a termination booth, surely, but might have have a minute to finish my nice chat with Larry here before I go?”

We shall return to the PBEM Network’s presentation of The Bot Murders after these messages…


Perversity Points Totals:
Grov-R-LER (Dean-O-KTI-1): 60 PP
Elm-R-FUD (Roy-R-HBL-2): 38 – 1 (missed turn) = 37 PP
Max (Quentin-R-PAD-2): 60 PP
Rib-O-NZR (Hayate-R-GTK-1): 38 PP
Banequo (Aken-R-BSH-2): 40 – 1 (missed turn) = 39 PP
Open Slot (Isaac-O-MEL-1): 46 PP


Have your turns to me before 1200 GMT (That’s 0800 EDT) Friday.
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Turn 94
Go To A Confession Booth

Welcome Back, Loyal Vidshow-watching Citizens! And now back to our show.

Episode 3: Larry-R’s Lament

Turn 094: Go To Your Room A Confession Booth

Quentin-R suddenly gives a squeak of fright and scrambles under Larry-R’s desk and hides behind Larry-R’s legs. “Vatvatvatvat,” he says, “I didn’t intend to bootsmoke him. Not that it doesn’t serve him right… oh vat vat vat”

Dean-O’s face seems to be trying to look shocked around the happy, somewhat vacant look of a clone under the influence of Visomorpain. “He kicked you so you shot him?” he asks, “That is a little extreme, isn’t it? But I understand you were provoked, so I won’t order your immediate termination. However, I must insist you hand your weapon to our Equipment Officer until you have been to a confession booth. Stripey, escort Quentin-R to a confession booth while us norms get on with the real work.”

Isaac-O gives Dean-O a dirty look behind his back and moves forward to pull Quentin-R out from under the desk.

Larry-R tries to twist around to see Quentin-R, “Whatchu doin’ unner m’ deshk?”

Aken-R lies on the floor, recovering from his bout with the cubicle. The cubicle has won for now, but he will be better prepared and forewarned next time.

Roy-R-HBL-2 walks into the room.

We shall return to the PBEM Network’s presentation of The Bot Murders after these messages…


Perversity Points Totals:
Grov-R-LER (Dean-O-KTI-1): 60 PP
Elm-R-FUD (Roy-R-HBL-2): 38 PP
Max (Quentin-R-PAD-2): 60 PP
Rib-O-NZR (Hayate-R-GTK-1): 40 – 2 (missed 2nd turn… don’t make me open up another slot, Rib) = 38 PP
Banequo (Aken-R-BSH-2): 40 PP
Open Slot (Isaac-O-MEL-1): 46 PP


Have your turns to me before 1200 GMT (That’s 0800 EDT) Tuesday.
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Turn 93
Peow Peow ZAP!

Welcome Back, Loyal Vidshow-watching Citizens! And now back to our show.

Episode 3: Larry-R’s Lament

Turn 093: Peow Peow ZAP!

Dean-O says, “Quentin-R, stop that. It’s bad enough someone is stealing this poor clone’s supplies without you making things worse by stealing his actual office.” He then turns back to Larry-R and says, “Over that way, you say? Thanks, citizen. Come on, team.” He then turns to go.

Aken-R, apparently thinking that the cubicle opposite is the supply closet in question, despite it’s distinct lack of supplies, <clatterclatterclatter> attempts to do a dramatic roll into it, but in the close quarters, he misjudges and hits his head on the desk inside with a loud THWACK! He falls to the floor, stunned.

Quentin-R, however, has a few words for his team leader, “Sir, I really must protest – it seems to be my daycycle for being at the receiving end of unprovoked attacks to my person, and posterior, but surely enough is enough. Roy-R just tried to kick me.” He pulls out his laser pistol as he continues, “This wouldn’t happen if I had a barrel for my gun. Then I’d be treated like a real clone, cause I could just pull it out and peow-peow…”

There is a sudden zapping sound and a flash of RED light. <clatterclatterclatter> A smoking hole appears in Roy-R’s forehead. It seems that there is, in fact, a RED barrel on Quentin-R’s laser pistol after all. There is now, anyway. Roy-R appears to have been preparing to say something in response to Quentin-R, but obviously he won’t be saying it now. His body crumples to the floor.

Quentin-R continues his previous statement with, ”...pee….o…w. Well, now, WHERE did that come from!”

Larry-R looks on with a puzzled expression on his face, but otherwise does not react to the laser fire going off right in front of his face.

We shall return to the PBEM Network’s presentation of The Bot Murders after these messages…


Perversity Points Totals:
Grov-R-LER (Dean-O-KTI-1): 60 PP
Elm-R-FUD (Roy-R-HBL-soon to be 2): 38 PP
Max (Quentin-R-PAD-2): 59 + 1 (peow, peow, [ZAP]... it made me chuckle… a lot…) = 60 PP
Rib-O-NZR (Hayate-R-GTK-1): 41 – 1 (missed turn) = 40 PP
Banequo (Aken-R-BSH-2): 39 + 1 (heroically taking on the oh-so-dangerous empty cubicle) = 40 PP
Open Slot (Isaac-O-MEL-1): 46 PP


Have your turns to me before 1200 GMT (That’s 0800 EDT) Friday.
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Turn 92
A Heart-Wrenching Tale

Welcome Back, Loyal Vidshow-watching Citizens! And now back to our show.

Episode 3: Larry-R’s Lament

Turn 092: A Heart-Wrenching Tale

Roy-R says, “What a heart-wrenching tale of tragedy, thitithen. Retht aththured that we’ll find out what happened to your previouth clone.”

Aken-R, meanwhile, draws his laser pistol and quickly moves between Dean-O and the direction that Larry-R had pointed, as if expecting some danger to suddenly spring from the cubicle opposite Larry-R’s.

Hayate-R looks under Larry-R’s desk.

Dean-O asks, “Do you know who might be after your sussupplies?”

“I dunno, everbody!” Larry-R exclaims, waggling his arms in the air suddenly. “Everbody keeps stchealin’ m’ shtuff!”

Quentin-R, his eyes lighting up with glee, puts a reassuring arm around Larry-R’s shoulders. Along the way, Roy-R takes a swing with his foot to try to kick Quentin-R in the back of the knees, <clatterclatterclatter> but misses and Quentin-R is able to finish his maneuver. “Well, there may be other ways for you to get your stationary…,” Quentin-R says smoothly to Larry-R, “please… step into my office.” He then mimes opening an office door and stepping through, gently pulling Larry-R along.

Larry-R just continues to sit there in his chair. He looks confused at Quentin-R, “But thish ish my offish…”

Roy-R says to Quentin-R, “What the vat ith wrong with you, Quentin-R? Do you need your happinethth levelth adjuthted?”

Dean-O continues with his questioning, “How many times a day did your prime go to the supply… closet?”

Larry-R shrugs sloppily, “Oh… ‘bout twishe a week, I guessh… I washn’t countin’.”

We shall return to the PBEM Network’s presentation of The Bot Murders after these messages…


Perversity Points Totals:
Grov-R-LER (Dean-O-KTI-1): 60 PP
Elm-R-FUD (Roy-R-HBL-1): 38 PP
Max (Quentin-R-PAD-2): 59 PP
Rib-O-NZR (Hayate-R-GTK-1): 41 PP
Banequo (Aken-R-BSH-2): 39 PP
Open Slot (Isaac-O-MEL-1): 46 PP


Have your turns to me before 1200 GMT (That’s 0800 EDT) Tuesday.
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Turn 91
Hey! Look! Plot!

Welcome Back, Loyal Vidshow-watching Citizens! And now back to our show.

Episode 3: Larry-R’s Lament

Turn 091: Hey! Look! Plot!

Roy-R turns and glares at Quentin-R, “Quit thcrewin’ around with the witnethth,” he says coldly.

Dean-O says to the now very relaxed Larry-R, “That’s better. All friends here, we’re here to help. Now could you confirm for me that you are Larry-R-WRC-2?”

Larry-R grins sloppily, “Thash’s Me!”

Dean-O continues, “Good. C-could you describe for me, in your own w-words, the events of 214-5-20?”

Quentin-R, however, seems to have his own question, “So, Larry, your cubicle seems dangerously under stocked in stationary – there’s none at all. Where is it all?”

Larry-R’s grin evaporates, and he pales somewhat, but he doesn’t start to panic again, “I wash jusht mindin’ m’ own bishnesh. I jusht wanded a new pen, cus shomeone’sh aw-waysh shtealin’ m’ shtuff, shee?” He gestures at his nearly empty desk. There is only his terminal still there. No papers or other normal office supplies are present. “Dey’r shtill shtealin’ m’ shtuff, but ah won’t go back to the schupply closhet… Nope, ‘cus dey might come back… Might git me too, like dey did m’ Prime. I jusht opun da door and…” He makes a rude noise and gestures vaguely. “Necsht tin’ I know, ‘m desh… de… duc… poppin’ out da’ tube. Dun’ know wha happin ta Prime in der. Ma Mumo… men… brain tingy recurd shtops when I opun da door. Ifn ya wanna look fer yersef, it happin ret uver der,” He points toward the ‘east’ exit of the room, “in da li’l pasr… pass… hallway ta nesht room. Can’d mish it… I ain goin’ doe… nu uh… dey might git me agin….”

We shall return to the PBEM Network’s presentation of The Bot Murders after these messages…


Perversity Points Totals:
Grov-R-LER (Dean-O-KTI-1): 60 PP
Elm-R-FUD (Roy-R-HBL-1): 38 PP
Max (Quentin-R-PAD-2): 59 PP
Rib-O-NZR (Hayate-R-GTK-1): 42 – 1 (missed turn) = 41 PP
Banequo (Aken-R-BSH-2): 40 – 1 (missed turn) = 39 PP
Open Slot (Isaac-O-MEL-1): 46 PP (Come on, you know you wanna play with us…)


Have your turns to me before 1200 GMT (That’s 0800 EDT) Friday.
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Turn 90
Yesh, Ffffriend Compooter

Welcome Back, Loyal Vidshow-watching Citizens! And now back to our show.

Episode 3: Larry-R’s Lament

Turn 090: Yesh, Ffffriend Compooter

Aken-R, still smiling, says cheerfully, “Mutie-sir Dean-O has not finished intero—I mean talking to you yet I think you should sit back in the chair.” He then cracks his knuckles threateningly while still looking at Dean-O.

At the sound of knuckles cracking, Larry-R redoubles his efforts to climb over the rear wall of his cubicle.

Hayate-R points at the stain left on Larry-R’s chair and shouts, “Ara! A hygienu code vioration!”

Dean-O just stands there, watching events unfold.

Roy-R looks at the others, and, seeing that the others are neither making a move to stop Larry-R nor chastise Quentin-R for sending him over the edge, facepalms before going after Larry-R himself. He grabs one of Larry-R’s ankles just as he gets half-way over the partition wall. “Calm down, it’th jutht thome medicated idiot,” he says to the still panicking citizen.

Meanwhile, Quentin-R pops up from under the desk, sits on the desk, and grabs the other ankle.

Larry-R is effectively stopped from going any further, but continues to scream in fright while still struggling franticly to get away.

Suddenly, a dart shoots out of some hidden spot and hits Larry-R in the shoulder. His struggles begin to weaken.

At that time, one might notice that the Eye of Friend Computer has appeared on the nearest wall-mounted screen.

“Larry-R-WRC. I have detected abnormally high adrenaline levels in your bloodstream. I have acted to neutralize this and return you to a calm state. You will now submit to questioning by these fine Troubleshooters. Is that understood, citizen?”

“Yesh, Ffffriend Compooter,” Larry-R slurs in response and sluggishly allows himself to be pulled back into his seats. One back in the seat, he smiles up at Dean-O sloppily and says, “Sho… whatcha wunna know, shitishen?”

We shall return to the PBEM Network’s presentation of The Bot Murders after these messages…


Perversity Points Totals:
Grov-R-LER (Dean-O-KTI-1): 60 PP
Elm-R-FUD (Roy-R-HBL-1): 38 PP
Max (Quentin-R-PAD-2): 59 PP
Rib-O-NZR (Hayate-R-GTK-1): 42 PP
Banequo (Aken-R-BSH-2): 40 PP
Open Slot (Isaac-O-MEL-1): 46 PP (Welp, that’s it. I still haven’t heard anything from DJ. Slot re-opened.)


Have your turns to me before 1200 GMT (That’s 0800 EDT) Tuesday.
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Turn 89
WwwOoooOOOOoooOOO

Welcome Back, Loyal Vidshow-watching Citizens! And now back to our show.

Episode 3: Larry-R’s Lament

Turn 089: WwwOoooOOOOoooOOO

Dean-O says, “You seem worried, citizen. Do you know why someone would want you dead?”

Aken-R continues to smile and look threatening while standing slightly behind and to one side of Dean-O, though he seems to be watching Dean-O while trying (quite unsuccessfully) to do so while seeming to still look at Larry-R.

Larry-R nervously replies, “You mean yo-OOOOIIIEEEEEEE!!!” and suddenly leaps up and climbs up on his desk, trying to climb over the cubicle wall behind it. There is a small puddle left behind in his seat, and a spreading wet area at the crotch of his jumpsuit.

The reason for this sudden panicked reaction could have something to do with the “wwwOoooOOOOoooOOO” sound that started at about the time of Larry-R’s shriek, and Quentin-R’s finger that had slipped out from under the desk to touch the nervous citizen’s leg at the same time.

We shall return to the PBEM Network’s presentation of The Bot Murders after these messages…


Perversity Points Totals:
Grov-R-LER (Dean-O-KTI-1): 60 PP
Elm-R-FUD (Roy-R-HBL-1): 39 – 1 (missed turn) = 38 PP
Max (Quentin-R-PAD-2): 59 PP
Rib-O-NZR (Hayate-R-GTK-1): 43 – 1 (missed turn) = 42 PP
Banequo (Aken-R-BSH-2): 40 PP
djones0823 (Isaac-O-MEL-1): 46 PP (last turn of leeway. If no turn this time, I’m re-opening the slot.)


Have your turns to me before 1200 GMT (That’s 0800 EDT) Friday.
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Turn 88
Do Not Want

Welcome Back, Loyal Vidshow-watching Citizens! And now back to our show.

Episode 3: Larry-R’s Lament

Turn 088: Do Not Want!

Dean-O smiles at Larry-R and steps into his cubicle. Aken-R walks in behind Dean-O, both smiling happily and looking intimidating at the same time. The effect is of a slightly unhinged clone. <clatterclatterclatter> On such a large clone, though, that is still quite intimidating, and Larry-R definitely looks intimidated.

“Don’t be alarmed, citizen, we’re troubleshooters. We’re here to talk about your death,” Dean-O assures the nervous RED. Roy-R nods in agreement. Hayate-R looks on warily.

“M-M-My death?” Larry-R squeaks, “Oh no, I don’t want to die again!” He backs his chair against his desk, trying to get as far from the Troubleshooters as his small cubicle allows. He appears to be one sudden move away from loss of bladder control.

Quentin-R, in the meantime, slips past the others and crawls under Larry-R’s desk. Larry-R doesn’t seem to notice, since his entire attention is riveted to the rest of the team.

We shall return to the PBEM Network’s presentation of The Bot Murders after these messages…


Perversity Points Totals:
Grov-R-LER (Dean-O-KTI-1): 60 PP
Elm-R-FUD (Roy-R-HBL-1): 39 PP
Max (Quentin-R-PAD-2): 59 PP
Rib-O-NZR (Hayate-R-GTK-1): 43 PP
Banequo (Aken-R-BSH-2): 40 PP
djones0823 (Isaac-O-MEL-1): 46 PP (AWOL, but given reprieve 1 more turn)


Have your turns to me before 1300 GMT (That’s 0800 EDT) Tuesday.

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Turn 87
Larry-R... Finally!

Tangy Tommies Tastey Toasted Treats. All the very best in algae chips and exotic soylent flavours. Tangy Tommies Tastey Toasted Treats – where every mouthful brings pleasure. Available at BLUE Clearance. Welcome Back, Loyal Vidshow-watching Citizens! And now back to our show.

Episode 3: Larry-R’s Lament

Turn 087: Larry-R… Finally!

Hayate-R returns Aken-R’s weapon to him, saying, “Hai, This weaponu isu fine.”

Quentin-R goes over to the nearest cubicle in a direct line from where the ORANGE had pointed, and starts trying to climb the partition wall.

Isaac-O hefts Quentin-R’s Sports Bottle in his hand, contemplating Quentin-R and his antics, then grins and puts away the bottle.

Dean-O tells the ORANGE, “Thanks very much,” and turns back down the aisle in the direction they came.

Roy-R looks in the direction the ORANGE indicated and nods in a satisfied manner. He catches up the Dean-O and asks, “Are we gonna go quethtion thith guy now?”

Quentin-R continues struggling to climb up on top of the partition, while the others follow Dean-O.

As the others turn the corner to head toward the proper aisle, the partition Quentin-R is trying to climb breaks lose and tips over, dumping him back on the floor, much to the annoyance of the RED inside the cubicle. The RED begins to express his anger both verbally and physically. He kicks the semi-prone Quentin-R while yelling things that are mostly bleeped out by the PBEM Network sensors. Almost immediately, a pair of GREEN IntSec Goons run in, pull the RED off of Quentin-R, and force feed him a couple of INFRARED pills. The RED shortly calms down greatly, smiles and sits back down at his desk, ignoring any further proceedings. The goons pick the partition up off of Quentin-R, and set it back into place. They then cross their arms and glare down at Quentin-R. One speaks in a gruff tone, “Leave the partitions alone from now on, citizen. We don’t want a repeat of what happened downstairs.”

Meanwhile, the rest of the team has reached (finally) the cubicle of Larry-R. Inside of the cubicle is a nondescript RED. His desk, oddly enough, appears to have a decided lack of office supplies, as if the occupant were somehow reluctant to get more as they’re used up. He has also set up his terminal so that his back is not toward the door of his cubicle when working on it. He is typing at his terminal furiously, obviously very busy.

Dean-O asks, “Larry-R?”

The Larry-R starts and turns quickly, looking wild-eyed. “What? W-W-W-What do you want?

We shall return to the PBEM Network’s presentation of The Bot Murders after these messages…


Perversity Points Totals:
Grov-R-LER (Dean-O-KTI-1): 60 PP
Elm-R-FUD (Roy-R-HBL-1): 39 PP
Max (Quentin-R-PAD-2): 59 PP
Rib-O-NZR (Hayate-R-GTK-1): 43 PP
Banequo (Aken-R-BSH-2): 41 – 1 (missed turn) = 40 PP
Open Slot (Isaac-O-MEL-1): 46 PP

Have your turns to me before 1300 GMT (That’s 0800 EDT) Friday.
DJ missed three turns in a row without explanation, so Isaac-O is now available for someone to jump in and take over. In the meantime, he will be NPCized if needed, but for the most part, he’ll follow along quietly unless addressed directly.
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Turn 86
What's a Goldfish?

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1 Magnetic rail may cause Asimov failure in some bots. Magnetic rail may be a recycled rail gun. Reports of bots being sent into orbit are exaggerated. Mostly.

Welcome Back, Loyal Vidshow-watching Citizens! And now back to our show.

Episode 3: Larry-R’s Lament

Turn 086: What’s a Goldfish?

Aken-R grins happily at the team as Hayate-R takes his weapon and bows slightly with a quick, “Hai!” He starts to inspect the laser pistol, which does visibly show one of its shots has been fired.

Dean-O turns toward the others, away from the ORANGE in the cubicle. “You see, Quentin-R? It’s all a misunderstanding. No-one is trying to kill you. Now… where’ve they gone?” He starts looking around, confused.

Quentin-R looks shocked. “My Smoke was properly extinguished, before the heat from my recently toasted posterior burnt it and the chair,” he asserts.

“Thitithen, the term “poop chute” is not an approved term for that portion of clone anatomy,” Roy-R tells Quentin-R, “Appropriate termth are probably lithted in the joint report RDHPDMC 4514-A: Proper Euphemithmth For Clone Partth (Pothterior Region). Now be quiet. We’re about to find out where Larry’th cubicle ith. About time, too.” He then wipes his chin, where a bit of spittle has somehow appeared during his statement.

Quentin-R, however, appears to be getting a little twitchy. He turns to Isaac-O, “Say, can I have a look at my old Teela-O sports bottle? I would very much like to see it again.. it’s my… my pr….operty. Just a little drinkies….. Hmmm?”

Dean-O catches sight of the ORANGE worker again, right where he left her, “Ah, there you are. Terribly sorry about the interruption.”

“Right, well, as I was saying…,” the ORANGE worker begins again, but is once again interrupted by Quentin-R ask he edges over shakily to ask, “Uh, hi Miss. Hey, is it true you have to buy your own stationary supplies in these orrifices… I mean.. offices?”

He apparently doesn’t currently have the attention span given to a goldfish with ADHD, however, as he is immediately distracted by the partition wall in front of him. “Say, these are nice partitions…,” he observes.

The ORANGE ignores him and turns back to Dean-O and gestures toward the ‘east’, “Anyway, Larry-R’s cubicle is a couple of aisles back that way. It’s roughly in the middle of the aisle. Don’t take up too much of his time. He’s already behind on his work because of the delay for him to decant, so he’s very busy. Now if you’ll excuse me…,” and she turns back to her terminal and goes back to work.

We shall return to the PBEM Network’s presentation of The Bot Murders after these messages…


Perversity Points Totals:
Grov-R-LER (Dean-O-KTI-1): 60 PP
Elm-R-FUD (Roy-R-HBL-1): 39 PP
Max (Quentin-R-PAD-2): 59 PP
Rib-O-NZR (Hayate-R-GTK-1): 43 PP
Banequo (Aken-R-BSH-2): 41 PP
djones0823 (Isaac-O-MEL-1): 48 – 2 (missed 2nd turn in a row… one more…) = 46 PP

Have your turns to me before 1300 GMT (That’s 0800 EDT) Tuesday.
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